Tuesday, February 4, 2014

A Numbers Game

Today I read an article on Total Sorority Move, half expecting it to be, for lack of a better word, sex-filled. Which of course, it was, but I finished the article and felt like I could breathe. Before finishing this post, please go read this short and beautiful article real quick here.

Now that you've had the chance to read that, I'm going to talk. After battling an inner-self personal crisis as of lately, this article came up at the perfect time. As a college student, sex is part of our culture. Whether you're "doing it" or not, there is a stigma in our society either way. I feel I may be a little ballsy writing my first "real" blog post on an issue like sex in our society, but I was moved by the article and I can't not talk when something hits me on the inside like this.

Back to the article: We are surrounded by numbers. Whether its price tags, MPGs, how many Gs our phones get, the size on our clothes and the number of notches on our belt. But why do we have to slap a number on everything? The article talked about how there will never be the "right" number for us. As young women, we're told to be the "Madonna and the whore, the saint and the sinner." Its just not possible. Have too many notches? You're a whore. Don't have any? You're a prude. These labels are slapped on just as quickly as a number is added. It is complete kaka del torro  if you catch my drift. Luckily, women are starting to call out this double standard. Articles like this, on a major social media, like
 or even music, like one of my favorite songs.

I like what Kacey is saying here, and this song came to mind the second I read that article, and her lyrics are a great reminder for all of us girls to keep in mind.

If you save yourself for marriage, you're a bore.
If you don't save yourself for marriage, you're a horrible person.
If you won't have a drink, then you're a prude.
But they'll call you a drunk as soon as you down the first one.
You're damned if you do, and you're damned if you don't.
So you might as well just do whatever you want to
So make lots of noise, and kiss lots of boys.
Or kiss lots of girls, if that's something you're in to.

So, whether you're number is 0, 5, 15, or 50, you keep doing you. Slut shaming is appauling, and making women feel bad for exploring their sexuality, which might I add, is ENCOURAGED for men, is just outright absurd!

TSM made a really good point about our sexuality by quoting one of my all-time favorite shows: "The Office" Pam said, "It’s not about who you’ve been with. It’s about who you end up with. Sometimes the heart doesn’t know what it wants until it finds what it wants." all I have to say is, AMEN.


  1. Amanda... This is really good. I am really proud of you for making such true claims on the internet. For women, not matter what we do we are oppressed and ridiculed. Posts like this allow women to be heard and thought about differently!

    xo. Kailagh

    1. thanks Kailagh! I was a little nervous about doing a post this intense for my first "real" post. but I'm glad I got positive feedback from you! I think as women we are afraid to voice our opinions because there is the perception that women who speak out are "extreme feminists" or other such outrageous labels. Its silly. Its time for people to just do whatever makes them happy, whatever that means for them!

      xoxo, Amanda